We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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