3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
