Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
