Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
