Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
