I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Let's get the cat blown out
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
We need to feng shui this bitch.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
