Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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