Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
