Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(904): View more from Florida

i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.

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(904): i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina. http://tfl.nu/j0mi

Replies (13) Good night (6164) Bad night (835)
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(925): View more from California

I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs

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(925): I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs http://tfl.nu/k9ok

Replies (13) Good night (704) Bad night (4091)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets

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(609): That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets http://tfl.nu/cuwg

Replies (18) Good night (2431) Bad night (824)
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(443): View more from Maryland

Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.

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(443): Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere. http://tfl.nu/ui38

Replies (20) Good night (1290) Bad night (3678)
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(907): View more from Alaska

My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.

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(907): My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic. http://tfl.nu/erca

Replies (3) Good night (2091) Bad night (1213)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights

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(203): Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights http://tfl.nu/qbnp

Replies (5) Good night (1799) Bad night (1072)
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(704): View more from North Carolina

So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...

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(704): So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ... http://tfl.nu/bcgx

Replies (5) Good night (475) Bad night (1084)
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(707): View more from California

Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.

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(707): Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me. http://tfl.nu/6mha

Replies (6) Good night (1434) Bad night (383)
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar

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(403): there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar http://tfl.nu/sljc

Replies (13) Good night (1303) Bad night (438)
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(773): View more from Illinois

It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car

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(773): It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car http://tfl.nu/9u20

Replies (4) Good night (364) Bad night (799)
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(740): View more from Ohio

No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.

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(740): No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock. http://tfl.nu/8vp6

Replies (2) Good night (927) Bad night (463)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories

(1-919): View more from North Carolina

Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences

(919): View more from North Carolina

great clearly means different things to us

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(919): The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories (1-919): Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences (919): great clearly means different things to us http://tfl.nu/ha8x

Replies (2) Good night (708) Bad night (252)
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(309): View more from Illinois

Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.

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(309): Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign. http://tfl.nu/lj4r

Replies (5) Good night (257) Bad night (512)
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(516): View more from New York

I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.

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(516): I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly. http://tfl.nu/c92d

Replies (2) Good night (384) Bad night (218)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking

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(610): No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking http://tfl.nu/htwk

Replies (5) Good night (331) Bad night (314)

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