i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
