well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Randomize