Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
