C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
