i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
