I must be too annoying 4 u.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
