you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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