a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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