So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
No subtext here. People are naked.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
If I die, sorry about rent.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
