I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
