her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
The Olympian is in my bed
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize