Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
