I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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