Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
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I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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