you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize
