Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize