i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
