just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
