There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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