some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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