Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
