OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
