come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
