Swine flu. Run for my life!
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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