So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Randomize
