I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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