so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.