Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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