Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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