girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
