I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
How naked do you want me to be?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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