I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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