i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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