Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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