I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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