remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
love makes seman taste better
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
