in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize