: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
