id be glad to
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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