I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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