Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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