the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
