wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
